Little Pains of Attachment

As we go through life, we get attached to people, animals, places and things. Those are happy times when we have them in our lives. When we lose them, we experience sadness and the feeling of longing appears. I sometimes wonder if it is worth to allow myself attachments while I know that they are most of the times transient. The answer is hesitantly positive.

The thing is that attachments creep up on you, you really, do not make decisions in this matter. At least not from the start. But later on, an attachment can be reviewed and one can create an emotional distance to it or continue to build it up to its potential when you can be hurt by the disappearing link.

                                               

                                                 

In my life, I experienced many departures of people, I left behind many places I loved, many of my belongings are no longer mine, three of my best doggy friends passed on. This was associated with pain, at times even an excruciating pain.  Still, this means that I loved and it was worth the risk of future pain. What is happening now does not call for such a dramatic introduction, but I got surprised by the sadden feeling of emptiness and a  little sadness after my neighbours moved out and left for Melbourne. They were ideal neighbours, young, helpful, friendly and inspirational. Both of them interesting people in many ways. And there were also two cats Snow and Indy, they liked to visit my garden and I liked to watch them frolicking around. I knew that they were all going to move out one day and I did not think that there was anything sad about it.

Yesterday was their last day in the place and when I was coming home from my bridge session, the orange car belonging to them was no longer in front of the house. The sadness and sense of loss hit me unexpectedly.  This was not a pleasant feeling and I did not want to experience it at all. So I went on with my normal occupations, but some negative feeling lingered through the evening. This morning working on my computer at the desk overlooking the garden, I subconsciously expected to see Indy or Snow climbing the fences around the garden. And I realised that they are not in their old home anymore and they will not pay me a visit. Sadness again. Even now when the branches of the trees around move and the lighting changes I automatically lift up my gaze expecting to see a cat or two.

Another departure I will live with retaining nice memories and planning a visit in Melbourne where I will have two lots of friends from now on. The sadness will pass, especially that I will be leaving myself for Poland in few days.